What is the most common mistake people make?

It isn’t grammar; it’s silence.

This little guy in the photo doesn’t even know what the word means and I intend not to reveal its meaning any time soon - or better, at all (language context).

For us adults:

At school, we are taught that we must be correct, which is why many of us would rather say nothing than risk being wrong. We stop. We freeze. We want to produce the perfect sentence.

We think that silence means accuracy, but we couldn’t be more wrong. Silence means anxiety. While you search for the perfect word, the person you're talking to thinks you're confused, bored or stuck. The fact is that your silence speaks louder than your mistakes.

🐹 One way to escape this hamster wheel is to adopt 'bridge phrases' - also known as fillers. These are the oil that will smooth out your English.

• Instead of falling silent for five seconds, say: 'Let me think about...'

• Instead of freezing, say: 'What I'm trying to say is...'

• Instead of panicking, say: 'I’m looking for the right word, but basically...'

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Now, think back to your last English meeting or call. When you hit a wall, did you stay silent and reboot, or did you use a bridge to stay connected? Let me know in the comments below.

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Interested in finding out how this works?

Silence often triggers the amygdala, the fear centre. When you stop talking, your brain registers 'failure', and the panic increases. Using a 'bridge phrase' keeps your vocal cords moving and sends a signal to your brain that you are still in control. This keeps you in the prefrontal cortex.

This week, my lab members are doing the '1-minute umm challenge' on Discord, practising exactly how to bridge these gaps without breaking character.